New Zealand Category

The Grief journey..

There is the all too familiar saying “time heals everything..” is it true? Maybe, I don’t think so. I don’t think you ever heal. You learn to cope better, manage every day life better, you learn to smile again and re-emerge as the person everyone once you knew you as.

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When it hurts, it hurts

I am hurting. The pain is radiating from my heart and spreading down to the tips of my fingers and toes. It feels as if my hair aches and my finger nails are digging into me. This pain and grief feels familiar, common but also unfamiliar. I have not bathed in grief for a long […]

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A life worth living..

Dear Katie Hopkins, It has been almost a year since you wrote this (and various other things about dementia); “Dementia sufferers should not be blocking beds.  What is the point of life when you no longer know you are living it? Bang me over the head.” I, fortunately, have only just stumbled across your careless […]

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Letters to my Mama… part 4

Dear Mama, This morning your delusions had the best of you, when I came in to say Hi you were so sad. I sat with you and asked you what was wrong, with your beautiful eyes looking up at me, you whispered ‘I think I have to go away.’  I reassured you that you were […]

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A few helpful tips..

This time of year is a hard time for families caring for someone with alzheimers/dementia.  Services shut down or go to a skeleton staff, family and friends go away for the holiday season, it is hot, tiring and the days are long. Carers are often exhausted and will look that way. I know this from […]

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The kindness of caring

As the days turned to weeks, and weeks to months it became more and more obvious that I would be caring for Mum permanently.

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The cost of caring…

I write this and think that maybe a lot of people will say, “maybe it is time for full time care.” It’s not. Trust me.

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We miss you

And when great souls die,
after a period peace blooms,
slowly and always
irregularly. Spaces fill
with a kind of
soothing electric vibration.
Our senses, restored, never
to be the same, whisper to us.
They existed. They existed.
We can be. Be and be
better. For the existed.”

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Letting go

Caring for my Mama, for my Martha is not easy. It is also not the hardest thing either. If you resist it, it’ll be cruel to you, if you let it in, it’ll be magic!!

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Ramblings of redundancy…

I got over it. I just simply let it go. ‘Fuck them’ I thought.

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